I’m gonna try and leave the bitching to a minimum cause I don’t think anyone wants to listen to me complain for the entirety of this piece. And if you enjoy me bitching, then this paragraph goes out to you. We missed Sharks for which i was bummed. I was actually looking forward to seeing them as I dig their new album. Instead we got there as Hot Water Music’s Chuck Ragan was going on. I like HWM and I like Chuck. I dug his set and for at least a moment thought maybe I was in for a good time. Let me back up a little. The crowd mostly sucked. I hate greasers. If you’re a greaser and you’re reading this, I’m sorry but your scene is lame. I don’t care about cars and you dress like idiots. The 50s are over. Move on. Aside from all greasers as a race tho, if I had to pick one single human being I despise (and I’m being entirely serious here)… if i had to pick one person, just one… one person out of all of musicdom that I cannot stand… will not stand for… fucking hate…. it’d be ex-MTV VJ and current NYC radio show stooge Matt Pinfield. Guess who introduced Social Distortion? Yeah, so that soured my mood substantially. By the time The D took the stage I was at the point where I was afraid to stay and ruin my memory of all the things I love about them. Made it through the first four songs and tapped out when they kicked into the afore mentioned Machine Gun Blues. I feel like a shit for bailing on a show. I’m not saying I did it to be cool or to say that the people that stayed are dumb for doing so. I just wasn’t having fun so what was the point for me? I hope everyone that stayed had fun. Cept of course for Matt Pinfield. I hope he choked on one of the overpriced hot dogs the Stone Pony was selling. And speaking of things for sale (and this will be the last part of my bitch session)… Social Distortion were selling their shirts for $30. Their jackets for $125. Their buttons for $10. Fuck. That.

So what did I do after leaving? Listen, I didn’t want the night to end that way. That would be me being a defeatist. And Uncle T is not to be defeated. So instead, I headed three blocks over to Asbury Lanes for The Queers show. When we got there there were maybe 20 people hanging out. The rest of the town was undoubtedly over at Social Distortion. But after an hour or two many of the SD crowd began filtering over and before you knew it the place was packed. Openers Dear Landlord (who quoted Ness banter from “Live at the Roxy” to perfection) and The Front (who closed with a killer cover of Fear’s I Don’t Care About You) were both great. Also great were the $3 Yuenglings and BBQ Tofu & Avacado sammich I enjoyed while there. The lanes is a great place to see a show. The second I walked in I felt at home and glad to be there. By the time The Queers took the stage my mood was completely turned around. I had such a good time flipping out to songs like Kicked Out of the Webelos, Ursula, Hi Mom It’s Me, Cindi’s on Methadone, I Spent The Rent, Monster Zero, and You’re Tripping. I was even able to trade up and get a new Queers “Fuck You” Converse Logo shirt to replace the one I bought when I first saw them back in ’93. And it only cost me half of what Social Distortion was charging. All in all a good night.

J Mascis – Several Shades of Why 12″
J is my favorite guitarist. I’ve said it a million times on the FSS and I’ll keep sayin it. We went to see him at Mercury Lounge a couple weeks back and at one point P asked me if he was playing a 12 string guitar as J was sitting and P is short. When I told him it was only six he deduced J had extra fingers. Seriously, at one point he was simultaneously playing lead and rhythm on the same guitar. Was insane. So it’s no surprise I dig his new album. Let me for a minute tho say something about the vinyl. For one it’s clear purple with this colored haze and looks rad as fuk. But more importantly it sounds amazing. I spent the first week of owning this album listening to the mp3s on my phone. When I finally sat down with the wax it wasn’t even like I was listening to the same album. Vinyl doesn’t always sound better but when it does Christ it really does.

OFF! – Compared to What 7″
Another band I recently took in. This time at Santos Party House. OFF! Is the band you’ve been needing in your miserable life and just didn’t know it. Two more blasts about ruts and familial dischord in old school 1-2 fuk you fashion. This one is out now on Southern Lord in 2 versions. Retail and tour edition. I got the tour edition when I saw em. Keith even signed it for me at the merch table. Heavy gauge clear blue vinyl. Sounds like a bomb.

OFF! – Live at Generation Records 7″
I feel like I was just talkin bout these guys. Anyway, if you’re not from the NY/NJ area Generation is a killer record shop down by Washington Sq Park that the FSS has been going to for close to 20 years. This 7″ was OFFs entry into this years Record Store Day but they had em at their show too. Four tracks that while awesome don’t do justice to their live show. Ya had ta be there dude.

Fucked Up – The Other Shoe / A Little Death (digital singles)
I played The Other Shoe in my car for P a couple weeks ago and he said Fucked Up are what U2 would have sounded like if they came up in Hardcore and listening to Black Flag. And as much as I fucking despise Bono n crew, he had a point. This song and their recently released second single A Little Death are the densest hardcore I’ve heard maybe ever. There’s just so much going on in these tracks musically it’s hard to put it into words. Head to the matablog and download em for free to see what I mean. I defy you to not jump outta yer skin when Pink Eyes comes in with a “rat-tat-tat”. June can’t come any sooner.

Black Flag – Licorice Pizza 7″ (reissue)
I picked this up a couple weeks back. As the story goes, Henry joins the band and around this time as a gift to fans they put this 7″ out with the first two Henry sung tunes and give em away at a record shop called Licorice Pizza. The shop ends up throwing what they can’t give away in a dumpster and no one really knows how many made their way into captivity. Henry sounds great on Thirsty and Miserable and Life of Pain. Better than “Damaged” in it’s rawness plus they throw in Dez sung Spray Paint for good measure on the reissue. If you ever listened to or read “Get in the Van” you know how nuts it was for ol Hank to have left everything in DC to jump with Flag. You’ll also know just how poor and day to day these guys were living at the time. Just look at em on the cover of this one. So fucking intense. Yeah I dig this one.

Dinosaur Jr 2011 Bug Tour

Aight FSS’ers, if you didn’t know there was a minor theme running in my reviews this week it’s these shows that Dinosaur Jr are doing. When I first heard about this show I actually wondered if maybe it was my idea that someone stole from me in a dream in some sort of twisted sci-fi punk rawk alternate reality. Or maybe my music choices lately somehow bore influence on the cosmos. I dunno. But here we are kids. Dinosaur Jr playing with OFF! and Fucked Up with Henry Rollins doing some oddball band interview at each stop. I can’t not go. And you, yah you, reading this right now… You’re gonna go too and buy me beer and merch. I’m willing that too.

Onkyo Equipment Is Good (or The FSS Save Japan)
When I was growing up in the 80′s I discussed stereo with my Dad and I learned from him a couple things:
1. Any good song sounds 10 times better after 5 beers.
2. Japanese stereo equipment sucks.
Yah, I’m sorry if that sounds bad, but there it is. So for Christmas one year I asked for a tape deck and I received a huge Onkyo TA-2000. “ What the fuck is this Jap nonsense?” I asked. Not out loud though, cuz I wasn’t stupid. But, as I hooked it up and popped in, I don’t remember, maybe whatever the current Ratt album was at the time, it quickly became obvious that Onkyo stuff most definitely did not suck, even in an era when the market was flooded with gaudy, amp overestimating, pieces of shit from both sides of the Pacific. Onkyo made good, affordable stereo then and they still do. Hit them up. Also, give money. Japans a fuckin’ mess. – P-

Thin Lizzy – Every Damn Thing They’ve Done
So last month Gary Moore went to his untimely and ugly, ugly grave. And it was just Saint Paddy’s. So here’s a word or two about Thin Lizzy. They were simply the very best of a very bad genre. They made Kiss look like a Black Metal Menudo. Which, now that I think about it, they might actually have been. They made dueling lead guitars almost okay. Almost. They wrote songs about drinking and fighting and being back in town and jail breakin’ and kickin’ dames. And I’m not a fan of misogyny. It just makes for good Rock and Roll. So hopefully you enjoyed the day and put some Thin Lizzy on the jukebox. Nobody saw that coming, you fucking obvious bastard. -P-

The Hookers – s/t EP
A little while back. I wrote about this band from Kentucky called Hookers. Just Hookers They were a retarded, retarded band. I liked them a lot. But I’m not talkin bout them right now. The Hookers , emphasis on the THE, were basically Murder City Devils minus a couple people. They put out one album a little back on Cold Crush Records. Sounds like it was recorded in a bathroom. It rocks so bad it should be in detention. -P-

Lee Scratch Perry – Every Damn Crazy Thing He Done Did
Wanna hear a story? So Chris Blackwell, the founder of Island Records, he invites Lee Perry over to his palatial Jamaican estate to talk about buying the rights to Scratch’s discography. So Blackwell leaves Scratch alone in the living room for a minute, comes back to see little smiling Lee Perry sitting on the leather couch and a steaming, smiling pile of Lee Perry shit in Blackwell’s cut-crystal bowl on the coffee table. Lee Perry once wrote a letter to the government to get Paul McCartney loose of a drug beef. Lee Perry shacked up with a Swedish royal for a period of time. Lee Perry invented Hip Hop in one afternoon on a Wednesday. Lee Perry is like 5 foot nothing, very trim and yet weighs 6,00 pounds. Lee Perry is not sure what year he was born in, but he was present at your conception. Lee Perry invited Andrew W.K. to co-produce his album. Lee Perry lives in Switzerland and freaks all the Swiss out. Lee Perry built a studio with his own hands. Then he burnt it the fuck down. Cuz Fuck You, that’s why. -P-

Yo La Tengo – Prisoners of Love
I went to a Mexican restaurant a few years back and they were playing Yo La Tengo on their PA. Either the name confused ‘em or Mexicans are big indie rock fans. If like me yer also a confused Mexican, Yo La Tengo are a 3 piece Jewish rock band from Hoboken NJ. Despite their eternal hipster cred they’re easily the best thing about Hoboken next to Maxwells and a certain Op Ivy song. If yer not sure, start with the 2 disc “Prisoners of Love” (some versions even come with a third disc called “A Smattering of Outtakes and Rareities”), but I garuntee you’ll end up buying ‘em all soon there after. -T-

X-ray Spex – Germfree Adolescents
I read recently that Poly Styrene has cancer. A bummer I know. I listened to this the other day in the car and it only made me bummed me out more. Everyone knows or should know punk staple Oh Bondage, Up Yours (shit the afore mentioned Yo La Tengo even covered it) but this album is chock full of hits from Identity to The Day The World Turned Day-Glo to I Live Off You. Get better soon Poly. -T-

Tomahawk – s/t
With members of Faith No More, Helmet and Jesus Lizard innit this can’t not be good. When you listen to as much music as I do it’s hard to say this person is my favorite guitarist (cough J Mascis) or that person is my favorite bassist (cough Mike Watt) or so forth but I can say with great certainty that Mike cough Patton is my favorite singer. Not all his side projects are winners but when they’re good they’re unbelievable. Check this one or the followup “Mit Gas”. You should probably avoid their American Indian inspired album “Anonymous” like a smallpox covered blanket tho. What? Too soon? -T-

Born Against – The Rebel Sound of Shit And Failure
I know P covered this one before but I had it on my phones the other day and felt compelled to echo the sentiment that this may be the best hardcore album ever made. Just brutal shit that will make you lose yours. Also one of the best album names of all time.  Also one of the best album intros of all time (Hello, shit? We’re Born Against so suck my fuckin lizard.”).This band got a bad rap for awhile cause they were funded by the buttload of money one of Sam McPheeters’ relatives left him after kicking off. I gotta say tho that there wouldn’t have been a more righteous way to blow the money. Few other bands charge me up like this one.  Few other bands hate as much shit as I do.  Face the flag son. -T-

Afghan Whigs – Gentlemen
Since 1993 this has been and will always be my favorite album of all time. I’m still figuring out how to tattoo the lyrics of My Curse somewhere on my body. The fine folks at High Speed Soul just reissued it on 180 gram vinyl. A product of the 90s I like to think this one stands the test of time. If you disagree I don’t know that we can get down.  If you’re not sure buy the vinyl now and see what I’m talkin’ bout.  -T-

Inspector 7 – Live at Court Tavern, Hub City, 2/19/11
My lovely wife found out about this show the day of. We’re about 20 minutes from New Brunswick so it was an easy decision to go. Plus Inspector 7 only plays a show once every 5 years or so these days. There was a time tho when you could have seen them weekly round these here parts. They teased a new album in the works this last time. Kids are shaving their heads in anticipation already. -T-

D.I. – Richard Hung Himself (song)
I don’t own anything by this band but I always dug the song Richard Hung Himself and the bands performance of it in the movie “Suburbia”. My friend pointed out to me the other day that the singer was just arrested for doing drugs in front of his kid… cue the  I LEARNED IT FROM WATCHING YOU DAD!!!!!! psa. -T-

Punk Rock Item Of The Week That Isn’t Necessarily Punk Rock – Back To School
Yeah I know this movie has more to do with 80s New Wave than Punk… Yeah I know Oingo Boingo is not punk… yeah I know going to College or owning your own Tall and Fat Stores isn’t really punk either… but Rodney Dangerfield is a punk and I’ll go to the mat on that one. He dedicates buildings to himself, calls President Truman a pussy, makes really large meatball sammiches, and tells Kurt Vonnegut to fuck himself. I watch this one every time its on. -T-

Husked Du / Green Day – Record Store Day 2011 Split 7″ (FSS exclusive advance review)
Yeah I’m not fucking buying this. How’s that for your exclusive advance review? Fuck you Billie Joe. There’s a reason your initials are b.j., and I wont let you and your shitty band ruin Husker Du for me. Not now. Not ever. So let’s recap… fuck you again Green Day, enjoy your shitty Mellissa Etherage Broadway bullshit and Pepsi sponsored arena tours. I’ll be just fine sitting here now listening to “Candy Apple Grey” and “New Day Rising” back to back. -T-

Jawbreaker – Dear You
I just re-bought this on double 12″ vinyl. It’s really hard to say which Jawbreaker LP is my favorite. If you put a gun to my head though I might argue for this one. It’s a little more polished than the others, but lyrically there’s tracks on here that slay me. The 12″ reissue comes with a bunch of bonus tracks they did with J Robbins. A must own. Oh yeah did I mention Christopher Walken is on this one? He is so fuck you. -T-

Faith No More – The Real Thing
“Angel Dust” is their best album. It’s in my top ten at least. So why am I talkin bout this one instead? Cause I listened to it over the weekend and jammed the shit out to it. Billy Gould’s bass sounds so fucking killer on all these tracks. And if I didn’t already mention it (I did) Patton can sing like no other. Yeah Epic may have been an overplayed hit and yeah some of the other tracks surely sound like a product of the time but Surprise! You’re Dead makes me flip hard. Ah-hahahahahahaha IT NEVER ENDS!!!! -T-

The World Inferno Friendship Society – The Anarchy and The Ecstasy
I dig this one. The song Sick of People Being Sick of My Shit speaks to my soul. Look this one isn’t as dense as their last heavy concept work about Fritz Lang or whatever the fuck it was about but sometimes I don’t want to think too hard when listening to music I just wanna enjoy it. And I really enjoy this one. Catchy as fuck. Chunksaah mail-order wax is gorgeous and yes on the download code. -T-

Heidecker and Wood – Starting From Nowhere
If you read us often you know were big Tim and Eric fans here at FSS HQ. This album may be the oddest thing Tim Heidecker has ever done and that’s saying a lot. This is straight up crazy. Paired with Davin Wood (the dude responsible for Awesome Shows awesome music) the pair do kind of a Seals & Crofts / Hall & Oates type thing. Cept they go so hard and so straight faced if you didn’t know any better you’d think they were serious. They’re not. If you watch even 5 minutes of Tim and Eric you’ll know they’re obsessed with dads so it’s no surprise there’s a song about dads on here. There’s also songs about desert islands, weddings, and cross country skiing. And thankfully the bonus track Christmas Suite will round out uncle T’s 2011 Xmas mix nicely. -T-

Social Distortion – Hard Times and Nursery Rhymes
Oh Mike Ness. Self professed ex-convict. Friend to tattoos. Phenomenal guitarist. Eye liner err…supporter. Antiquing enthusiast . When will you stop writing such dumb lyrics? The gospel singer backups only make this album worse. Mobsters? The dust bowl? The worst album cover art ever? Christ. Me and P’s brother E spent the greater part of a morning commute together LOLing hard at this one and trying to come up with other clichéd sayings and nursery rhymes to sing to the music. Seriously picture Ness earnestly singing “you step on a crack, you’ll break you’re mothers back” and try not to laugh (not an actual lyric but might as well have been). And yet still I plan on seeing Social Distortion the next time they come round. I’m such a sucker for nostalgia sometimes. -T-

Reagan Youth – Live and Rare
Reagan Youth are one of my favorite Hardcore bands of all time and also one of my favorite New York bands of all time. You can download this one on the innertubes gratis if you look hard enough (wink). The live version of New Aryans on it is fucking amazing. Versions of USA, Go Nowhere, Reagan Youth, and that song from Airheads are all also amazing… I watched a documentary about Ronnie Reagan on HBO recently that almost painted him in a good light. This band would probably disagree. -T-

E Frankenstein n me got there early enough that we were able to get a primo balcony spot. This almost never happens. We hit up the Half King bar first and saw Yo La Tengo getting dinner (I honestly think I willed it by writing about them so much this week). Back to the show tho…

Titus Andronicus opened and fucking slayed. They’re from NJ tho. That’s how we do. At one point singer Patrick Stickles talked about how every time he hears The Pogues play Thousands Are Sailing he can’t help but marvel at the guts it must’ve taken for our ancestors to come over here with nothing but hope. I thought about that too when they played the song later that night.

Pretty sure the accordian player died that night.

Listen Shane looks like shit. Utter utter shit. But he still gets the job done even if he’s on autopilot. I will say this tho he seemed much more lucid than the time i saw him with his other band The Popes. The rest of The Pogues were on point as hell. I haven’t seen a group that tight since I last saw The Bad Seeds and that’s saying a lot.

So in summation, the next time you do something anything with your life or fail to do something think of your ancestors coming over on big scary boats with literally nothing but a want for their families to have a better life. Think of that and think of The Pogues doing Thousands Are Sailing and don’t half step. Irish or not were all immigrants on some level in America and we should try every day to make good on our great grandparents dreams. Remember this too when you hear about people fighting to close borders in this country. Happy St. Pats (albeit a lil late).

I was just getting into music in 1993 (What? Backed up too far?)… I mean I always liked music. But this was different. I was for the first time connecting with it on an emotional level. “Gentlemen” by the Afghan Whigs was THE album for me. Still is. Ranks up there with “Fun House” and “London Calling”. Since then I’ve gone backwards to “Big Top Halloween” (most money I’ve ever spent on a record). And frontwards from The Twilight Singers through on to The Gutter Twins. If its got Dulli’s name on it I’m buying. Some of my favorite records are my Whigs singles. Slap one on the turntable and catch a vibe every damn time. So yeah. Fuck it. I paid the extra five for the autograph one of his roadies probably signed for him.

Brother P was set to go but last minute had to attend to some personal shit. I feel bad and know he missed out. I still remember hearing the Whigs “Congregation” many many years ago for the first time in his bedroom (on cassette nonetheless). I remember visiting him and his new family in Iceland in 2006 listening to “Powder Burns” as we drove through the countryside. But lucky for P he has a stunt bradda and I work with the guy. So E Frankenstein and myself headed out. What followed was a stripped down 2-hour trip through Dulli’s immense musical cannon. It should also be noted that before heading over to the Bowery Ballroom we had some amazing amazing beers by Brooklyn’s Sixpoint called Brownstone. If you read this site often you know we know our beer as well as our rawk and roll so take this to heart and seek this brew out.

Dulli came out a little after ten and repeatedly had them turn the house lights down. By the second or third dimming you couldn’t even make him out anymore. Talk about setting the mood for some dark RnR. For me If I Were Going and Let Me Lie To You were the easy highlights. At one point Dulli even did this little Miles Iz Ded outro for a song I’m now blanking on. Bonnie Brae, Summers Kiss, Gods Children and Twilite Kid didn’t disappoint either. Dulli threw in three new songs off his next Twilight Singers album. Goddamn I’m looking forward to hearing the track Gunshots again when that one comes out. If I can be so bold, I suggest they do a 7” for that one.

Was a great night. If you get the chance to see him during this run of stripped down shows please don’t pass it up. And bring an extra fiver. That roadie spent all weekend signing them fuckers. Make it worth his while.

Bradda D Metalhead Esquire was supposed to accompany me but had to bail at the last minute. That’s right, metalheads dig Pavement too. It’s like Jews for Jesus or some shit. Coworker cohort and bloodline to P Frankenstein, E Frankenstein quickly jumped in to fill the gap which was real stand-up of him since he didn’t really know the band.  Me and E public trans’ed our sorry Jersey asses from Chelsea to Central Park treating fellow subway goers with Tim and Eric quotes along the way. E told his dad about it later and he said it was a goof and a spoof.

I learned the hard way that when someone at the Central Park Summerstage asks you if you want a double or single glass of wine it’ll cost ya $18 if you get greedy. Blue Moon had to do after that debacle. Also learned that opening act Thee Oh Sees are fucking fucking amazing. They came out huddled en mass in the center of the enormous stage as if they were still in a small club and straight brought the psychedelic garage rawk heavy style. I have never seen these guys in my life but they looked like an amalgam of other people so I felt like I knew them. Ya dig? Lemme splain. The singer looked like if John Joseph of the Cro Mags and Crispin Glover of Friday the 13th part 4 had a baby. And the bassist looked like my friend Georgie if he were a Skinhead and played like a subdued Flea.

So yeah Pavement were friggin phenomenal. Worth the year wait and then-some. They are the tightest loose band around if that makes any sense. Bob Nastanovich is a goddamn indie rawk treasure. Seeing him scream “I tried and I tried and I tried and I tried and I tried!” over and over was an easy highlight of the night. I’m not one of these people that can regurgitate setlists so I won’t try. Check out friends NYC taper (when their site comes back up after being crashed by rabid Pavement fans) to download their show in Brooklyn from two nights earlier… and hopefully this show too at some point. Suffice it to say they played all the hits and enough rare nuggets to keep anyone even marginally into them happy. Seeing Malkmus and Spiral Stairs jam together for two whole hours including a 5 song encore was pretty awesome too. Plus it was a beautiful NY night in the park. So by all means if you’re a diehard fan or completely unsure about them go see them before it’s too late.  And also check out anything at the Central Park Summerstage when it comes back round next year.  It was easily the best sounding outdoor concert I’ve ever been too.

And yeah the joint was Williamsburg Beard & Mustache Crew heavy but on this one I’ll agree with those smelly trust fund babies. Pavement are THE Indie Rock band of all time. Fuck Spoon. Fuck the Arcade Fire. Fuck MGMT. It is and has always been Pavement suckas.  And if you disagree… well you’re a fucking idiot.  See I told you I was 76% asshole.

- Pink Eyes, Fucked Up -

P’s Take: Just recently it has been deemed cool to be a nerd. I guess ‘cause of the information economy maybe. I have no idea what that is. But, whatever, it’s not cool to be a nerd, fuck what you heard. But, here’s another “but”, most of us are nerds anyway, so even if it ain’t cool (it’s not, we just went over that part) it should at least be comfortable.

Like the Fucked Up show we went to last week. The place was nerd heavy. I mean packed with fucking geeks. The place wasn’t even crowded and still managed to be FULL of poindexters. I am not excluding the band, nor would they wish me to. Fucked Up looks like they emerged from a High School band room and picked up the singer from his shift at Wendy’s. Pink Eyes is fat, takes off his shirt and does antics. Not like G.G. schtick, more like if John Candy was into punk rock. How awesome would that of been? Also he smells like moussaka and dog and he likes to hug people. Yah.

And they played one of the best shows I have seen in years. Cause they are fucking nerds, they mean what they are doing from the bottom of their earnest nerdish souls. They tore the mutherfucking roof off, then put it back politely. When Pink Eyes fattingly and smellily  jumped off the stage it was to sing and to clown around and fuckin hug people, not to do a flurry of combinations in the air (cough, Freddie Madball, cough) or do hardcore poses (cough, everybody,cough). While howling, they made me remember being an ugly, broke-ass teenager yelling to records in my room even though I am now an ugly broke-ass growed up. God bless hardcore. God bless Fucked Up. God bless moussaka and fat nerds.

T’s Take: The FSS has been fucked up at Maxwell’s on a couple few occasions. Not to be confused… last week we saw Fucked Up at Maxwell’s and there was so much joyousness on hand that alcohol was not necessary. Remember this feeling? Sixteen years old at a show and having a retardedly good time off the sheer fun of the music? No one was jaded or too cool to freak out. It’s a beautiful thing and it’s something I hope I get more of in the near future. So thank you Fucked Up…my new favorite Canucks after the McKenzie brothers.

I kept thinking of History Lesson Part 2 by the Minutemen where D. Boon says “Punk Rock changed our lives.” in the same breath as “We were fucking corndogs.  We’d go drink and pogo.” I looked over to Brother P a couple times during the set and we were both smiling and pissing our pants laughing throughout. Pink Eyes worked the crowd like nothing I’ve ever seen. Hugging people. Throwing his mic then cartwheeling through the pit to get it back. Ordering root beers between screaming the chorus for Crusades. Sprawling out on the bar and slamming empty beer cups on his head. Most of this done in his underwear. Fucking. Fucking. Awesome. Corndogs indeed.

Three count em three guitarists plus bassist and one of the sickest drummers around only added to the mayhem.  Not to mention like Pink Eyes they all have great monikkers like 10,000 Marbles, Mustard Gas, Gulag, Guinea Beat, and Young Governor.  Off the top of my head they played The Two Snakes, Crooked Head, Twice Born, I Hate Summer, Black Albino Bones, No Epiphany, and Bodies by the Sex Pistols as an encore.

Remember at the end of Step Brothers where the father is all upset that he forgot how to be a dinosaur?  Fucked Up are the fucking dinosaurs of Hardcore.  All bands should operate in this manner.  All shows should be this much fun.  All Wednesdays should be this great.

I really only had two things to look forward to this summer. One was seeing Murder City play on FSS home turf, the other was seeing The Jim Jones Revue. Murder City tore it up, as you would expect. I’ll get to Jim Jones in a minute.

Expectation can be a motherfucker. How many times have you been waiting for an album to come out or a band to come to your area? You convince yourself that this record or show is going to be the business and then they just suck. Lotsa times. These things happen. So I got to thinking that this Jim Jones show may very well be a bust. Yeah there has been a lot of chatter going around about them putting on serious live shows, but fuck all that. Just because Spin gives something their stamp of approval doesn’t necessarily mean I will.

So we get to Maxwell’s and because I have money I am drinking as fast as I can. Then I am buying vinyl from the merch table, because I have been drinking as fast as I can. And the whole time I’m thinking, “Fuck, I really hope they don’t suck”. I just dropped thirty bucks on their records, I’m eight pints of beer in and I gotta get up in a couple hours for more training. This may prove to have been an expensive waste of time. Then they took the stage and straight blew it up.

See, I have made the point about people being true believers before, it is the difference between just doing something and doing something so hard your eyes bleed. Jim Jones and the rest of his band believe in Rock and Roll. And Jim himself, kitted out like the Preacher from “Night Of The Hunter”, demands you do so as well. You could make the argument that re-tooling 1950’s style rock in 2010 is a cornball move and that the piano is for douchefaces. And I would agree with you. But this isn’t about retro bullshit, Jim Jones basically plays stripped down maximum fuckin’ R and B and they do it loud and fast. Nothing kitschy about it and no-holds-barred.

So yeah, Jim Jones and company did not disappoint in the slightest, they helped make my summer less miserable. If you can, see them live. You won’t regret it.

For more Jim Jones Revue check out their Daytrotter Session and their WFMU Session from the weekend they played Jersey.

P’s Take: Me and Uncle T and the rest of the mighty Bolshevix have been friends for a long time, since we were 14 or so. So our taste in music, obviously with differences here and there, are pretty consistent. And we spent a lot of years going to the punk rock shows, doing punk rock things. And punk rockers are not immune from old-school sentimentality by a long shot. Lemme splain.

This past Sunday, T, his wife Sister Michele my brother Edawg and myself went down to Maxwell’s in Hoboken to see Walter Schreifels. There was so much remembered of things past going on Marcel Proust even would have encouraged people to move the fuck on. Did I just drop a snotty literary reference? Yas.

Some kid named was Brandon opened up, him and his acoustic guitar. I think he needed a ride home or something. He opened up with a cover of The Modern Lovers Hospital (my least favorite Lovers song) that was so fucking earnest my brother broke into hyena laughter at the “I go to bakeries” line and I had to spend the rest of his set looking at my shoes and wall. I was embarrassed for him. Jonathan Richman can get away with a lot of dumb lyrics cause he’s Jonathan Richman. This Brandon guy, not so much.

Then Walter came on, lookin’ all substitute teacherish. Let me get back to my point from paragraph 1. I take T’s opinion as valid on bands always. I had never heard Schreifels solo album, in fact, I was only familiar with Gorilla Biscuits and Quicksand. But if T was down with this cat, that was enough for me. Usually our taste doesn’t diverge so drastically. Usually.

Schreifels seems like a good dude. His band are made up of longtime friends, they all seem like solid, righteous cats. All of them have that old scene vibe. But fuck, how much memory lane can you do? They opened with a mostly acoustic set of AF’s Society Sucker, did a Quicksand number,a song Walt wrote for Civ back in day called Don’t Gotta Prove It and a medley of Start Today and a Morrissey song that right now escapes me. All of this going on with the centerpiece song of the night being An Open Letter To the Scene, a song about among other things, the death of Raybeez from Warzone of some years ago. What the fuck is going on here?

It’s not that the music was bad. It wasn’t. Or that it was corny and earnest like that kid Brandon who needed a ride home, it wasn’t that either. I just didn’t like it and I couldn’t place why exactly till later. I thought at the time it was because I didn’t have enough money for beer, but I didn’t like it cuz it made me sad. I’m 32 now and I guess I look back at my old days, the Bolshevix old days with fondness and I guess that’s what Schreifels was doing, only more so, being that he was in seminal NYHC bands back in the day. And I think that is what made in uncomfortable to watch and listen to, that and the fact that a Gorilla Biscuits/Morissey acoustic medley jam is just against nature. What made it uncomfortable maybe was that I fear being a skinny old punk rocker, lookin’ all substitute teacherish.

T’s Take: If you like music but hate crowds and hassles Sunday night shows at Maxwell’s are usually the way to go. I think during Brandon Reilly’s (Nightmare of You) solo acoustic set there were about 25 people there. This shouldn’t be a slight against Reilly either. People just don’t come out on Sunday nights like they do Fridays and Saturdays. Truth be told I actually dug Reilly’s set a lot. Hospital may not be the best Modern Lover’s song as P noted but it’s nevertheless a good song mixing great lyrics like “I still get jealous of your old boyfriends in the suburbs sometimes” with corny ones like “I go to bakeries all day long cause there’s a lack of sweetness in my life”. Either way the songs been stuck in my head now since Sunday to the point where I had to put on the “Live at Berkeley” album yesterday to get it out. Aside from Hospital Reilly did a bunch of stuff from Nightmare of you that I recognized which is odd cause I don’t actually own anything by them. Either way he seemed like a good guy and I hope someone gave him that ride home.

Walter Schreifels definitely brought about some mixed emotions during his set though. Schreifels himself, like Joe Pesci in Goodfellas, was a “funny guy”. He had the sound guy play the band off with that take it to the limit song from Scarface.  And his stage banter, while definitely unrehearsed and not always hilarious, still showed him having a good time and that shit is infectious (usually). Which is to say that I had a good time while my wife found him somewhat annoying. I think she would have preferred less chit-chat more rock. Which brings me to my second and more important point about Walter. Walter comes from a long line of Hardcore bands so you would think that maybe his set would’ve been (for lack of a better word) “harder”. I think this is what a lot of people probably expected. And often (especially when going to shows) expectations can make or break an experience. Sometimes bands don’t meet your expectations at all, sometimes they hit them dead on and other times they exceed them. I’m not sure entirely what I expected from Walter. I’m a huge Quicksand fan. In fact they were one of the first bands I remember being genuinely upset about breaking up. Rival Schools reminded me why Post Hardcore should be a relevant genre once more. And Walter has (more than) paid his scene dues over the years going back to starting the Youth Crew movement. More recently I had a great deal of time spent with his new solo album (review here). So I think, humor aside, my expectations were more or less in line with the performance.

Had Walter come out and straight brought the Hardcore for 45 minutes we all would have surely had a great time. He clearly knows the genre. Instead we heard ballads about Ray Beez and acoustic-ish versions of Thorn In My Side (Quicksand), and Pushed Too Far (Sick Of It All) and while rife with nostalgia for sure they bring me to my third and final point. Personally I liked them, but I can understand why people who see the originals as beloved wouldn’t. I can also understand how presenting them in such a manner smacks of nostalgia and even a little corniness. But I’d like to ask this. Would you rather Walter went the route of Sick of It All and put out 4 or 5 identical tired Hardcore albums over the last 15 years? Or would you rather he do something a little different and fresh? Or just do nothing? And look I’m not here to diss Sick of It All either. I still love them and look forward to seeing them play. But lets be honest. They haven’t had a solid album beginning to end since “Scratch the Surface”. Walter in the mean time has gone from Hardcore to Post Hardcore to Acoustic Rock and for better or worse has kept the original spirit (call it nostalgia if you will). So what do you want from these old Hardcore guys? I don’t have the answer.

Oh one more thing. Walter’s guitarist was the fucking King of Miami, Dave Hill. Awesome. Check him out to “feel the magic” and check out the below video of Walter and crew doing Don’t Gotta Prove It from the show we’ve just rambled about.

We went to see The Reverend in Teaneck fucking New Jersey. If you’re familiar at all with New Jersey you probably STILL have no fucking clue where in the fuck Teaneck is. The club (Mexicali Live) was fine as clubs go. The beer selection was fine as well, and although we didn’t eat there the food looked fine too. I chatted up the kindly bartender a bit when we got there and apparently the club had been there for over ten years or so (who knew) and a packed house is about 375 concertgoers. Know how many tickets The Reverend sold? 160. So at the end of the day that’s 158 happy concertgoers not including the FSS. And 215 unsold tickets.

Here’s the thing. It sucks that he’s not on Sub Pop anymore. It sucks that he’s doesn’t have videos on Mtv anymore.  It sucks that he hasn’t put out an album as good as his first few in around 10-15 years. It sucks that he’s not playing Irving Plaza or Roseland. And it sucks that he can’t even sell out a small club in fucking Teaneck. But wouldn’t you think then that you’d appreciate the few people that did bother to come out? The few people that bought your last album even though it was a major letdown (myself included)? Look, The Reverend wasn’t a dick to his whole audience. He didn’t pull a GG Allin and assault everybody with fecal matter either. Really he just fucked with my shit. But that’s all it takes.

Went down like this. Opening act, Miss Derringer was rockabilly at its most adorable. Miss Derringer herself could fit in your pocket and was cute enough that you’d want her in there. We dug her music and thought it was great that she went for it hard when the band covered Die Die My Darling to end their set. As opening acts go they were a great one. I got up front against the stage for The Reverend to take some pics for the site and get one video for our readers. I’m no asshole. I know that it’s disrespectful to record an entire set. Not only that it’s distracting to others and I wasn’t gonna do that. Instead I snuck a peek at the setlist and planned to record Psychobilly Freakout and then put my camera away for the rest of the night. I also am not one of these people that holds the camera up as to obstruct other people’s views either. I hold it in front of my chest and look down at the LCD screen to make sure everyone’s in frame. I’m not going to sell it or make money off it or anything. The videos we take for the FSS are purely to send the point home of why you should see a particular band the next time they come round. And The Reverend of all people could use some more bodies at his shows so you’d think he’d be cool with it. Not so. One minute into the song he makes his way over to me, gives me a dirty look and rips the camera out of my hand. Nice guy.

A couple poseur grease heads behind me cheered. Oh their hero!!! A man who will truly take no shit. A man who took a stand. Against what? A fan taking single video of one song out of a set of twenty-five to help promote the band? And I bet you dollars to vintage Stray Cats shirts that the douchegreases who cheered all would have loved to see a video of a concert THEY WERE AT on the internet the next day. One guy next to me kinda patted me on the shoulder and said that The Reverend was just fucking with me and that there were a bunch of people around us taking video and he just chose me to joke around with. But I saw the look he gave me when he did it and it wasn’t a joke. In fact I watched it a couple times this morning to confirm it. The Reverend is a straight dick. He’s done getting my money and support, and it’s a shame really cause otherwise he put on a hell of a show. But you won’t read about that here because I’m not gonna waste my breath any more on this cat. I snapped a couple pictures of him that I’m not posting here either (the punk rock TMZ the FSS is not). Instead I picked a shot of bassist Jimbo Wallace, who was nice enough to go around shaking the audiences hands (including mine) before he left the stage after the last song. A stand up guy with a stand up bass.  The Reverend however… well… I guess it’s true what they say. Everything’s bigger in Texas. Even the assholes.

P’s Take: I really didn’t wanna go to the Reverend show. I was tired and sick and what I had heard lately from Heat hadn’t really interested me. But I had agreed to it and Uncle T couldn’t find anybody to pick up my ticket so go I went. The club itself is pretty cool, despite being in Teaneck. The waitresses were lovely to look upon as well, again, despite being in Teaneck. Miss Derringer took the stage and I was feeling altogether much better about making the trip that night.

You know what they are like? They are like a Rockabilly Blondie. The singer is about 4’11″ and gorgeous, does this little 2-step and they played a kind of pop-rockabilly type stuff. They were definitely pretty good. They closed with Die Die My Darling. As T mentioned, the singer did go for it, however I have seen alot more menace coming from my 6 year old. ALOT more.

So then we waited for the Rev. And waited. A fuckin long time. When they came out I had already half lost interest and was watching the hijinks’s of the gaggle of suburban greasers that showed up. They were precious. But then the Reverend started and holy fuck. It was some evil, evil shit. I realized then that this was gonna be something, one way or the other.

First off the band are a group of characters. Heat himself looks like a Steinbeck character. He is a type of ugly people just aren’t any more, least not around here. The bassist looks like a chubby Irish boxer from the 30′s, like maybe he fought under the name Cannonball Costello. The drummer looks like a Professor of Folklore I had in Iceland. Yah. Anyway, the set ranged from fucking intensely good(the old stuff) to fucking stupid (the new stuff). The Suburban Greasers loved every minute of it, though. Which brings me to my next tangential point. I like some old stuff, however everything old-timey is not necessarily cool. For instance, here is a brief list of old shit that just don’t cut it: faith in the electoral system, choral singing, and western-swing polka bullshit. And there is a segment of the population who will get down to all of the above long as it is dressed up snazzily enough. Tell me I’m wrong.

So, to return to the review, Heat was, at times, fucking great. Really fucking great. But other times it was just, well, not. And you can’t grab the FSS’ gear. You just can’t. I don’t care how old-timey ugly you be.